2010
09.02
09.02
i occupy everything on my own
and think that it must be nice
to have a best friend because
it feels bad to walk to the bar alone
but with these nights of sobriety
come paranoia
and i don’t lock my doors
alone naked in my bed,
in my house, and
it’s never bothered me before
but now with these nightly dreams
of being held in places,
against my will, surrounded by explosives
i guess i fear an intruder,
abstractly
but i don’t want to stop sleeping
because i know exactly
what i will do
when i awake
i will drive to the coffee shop
in the next town over
to avoid having to speak to anyone i know
which feels depressing and embarrassing
but not nearly as severe as when i
walk away from a conversation,
i guess
i deserve
not